Have you ever prayed for a miracle? Me too. Were you disappointed if it didn't happen? Me too. Do you ever feel like it's not really your place to ask God to do something miraculous? I have. I'm wondering if Phillip felt that way too.
In #ec1dot08 we talked about how Jesus asked Phillip how they were going to feed all of the people gathered around them. Phillip scoffed at the idea and came up with the logical conclusion that there was no way they could afford to give everyone a single morsel let alone feed them a substantial meal. In our conversation, the question arose: if Phillip walked with Jesus and saw all of the miracles He performed, why wouldn't he ask Jesus to perform another one and feed everyone?
It could have been that Phillip didn't think it was his place to ask Jesus to do such a thing. Or maybe Phillip thought that he was being tested to solve this problem himself. Or maybe, he was afraid that Jesus would say no and he'd look foolish. I'm not sure what was going through his mind, but I do know that it was not what was going through Andrew's mind. Andrew found a kid's lunch and brought it to Jesus to do something that only Jesus could do.
The more I've thought about this, the more I realize that I don't really pray for or expect miracles to happen. It's not because I doubt that God is capable, but rather I'm afraid of the miracle not happening. The same questions I imagined might have ran through Philip's head, run through mine:
- What if it's not my place to ask? What if I make God upset by asking?
- What if I'm being tested? What if God wants to see if I can handle this myself and asking for Him to fix it would be taking the easy way out?
- What if He doesn't answer my prayer? What would that mean?
I have prayed for miraculous things to happen before. Sometimes the prayers were answered, sometimes they weren't. Sometimes I had to wait quite a while to finally see an answer. Does God still perform miracles? Yes, I believe so. Why don't we see them more often? Maybe because we're too afraid to ask. Now, I'm not saying that everything that we pray for will happen, God is not a genie and sometimes our prayers would interfere with His plans. But maybe the reason why we don't see miracles anymore is because we're not expecting to see them.